One Liner Wednesday – No Good Reason

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For Linda’s One Liner Wednesday

12.18.19 no reason

I see no good reason to act my age.

Rhiannon – Stevie Nicks

Til next time ~Peace ~JPP

 

Spoonie Sunday – Cowgirl Up

My Okayness

I’ve talked the last few weeks about the benefits and uses for aromatherapy and essential oils for Spoonies. Today I’m going to talk about other aspects of managing chronic disease and fatigue.

I’ve been in a nasty flare for over a month now. The fatigue can best be described as “soul crushing.” It is not an exaggeration when I say that it takes me half an hour to get out of bed. It’s also accompanied by pain. Every muscle, every joint, every minute of every day. I read an interesting little blurb in Psychology Today about chronic illness fatigue and how it changes you, you can read the full article here.

It’s not fair, nobody should have to live like this. Yes, I’m grateful for all my blessings, I’m thrilled to have my love at home and healthy (enough). But I’m also angry. Chronic illness fatigue can make anybody angry at the whole world, and envious of “other” people. That’s OK, it’s not fair, at all, and it’s OK to feel that.

That said, this is the hand I’ve been dealt and the question becomes, “How am I gonna play it?”

Lately I’ve dipped into depression, despondency, and just plain old whineyness. I can barely stand to be around myself. So I have decided to play my hand differently. There comes a time when you just have to “Cowgirl Up” stop complaining and just do it. Joints and muscles ache, take some ibuprophen and go on. Feeling lethargic? Drink another cup of coffee and get on with life (I have a startling tolerance for caffeine). Bored (we’re usually traveling this time of year), pick a hobby and get lost for awhile. Go wander around, kill monsters, and find treasure (computer games). Grocery trip left me so exhausted I can’t think of the word for it (oogie is all that comes to mind and I’m pretty sure it’s a real word), for Pete’s sake stop trying to impress the world with how well you manage and GO LAY DOWN for 20 minutes.

The point I’m trying to make with this mini rant is that life ain’t fair, chronic illness is seldom a “happily ever after” story, but there are lots of things I can do to improve my circumstances. Ways to fight back and live the best life I can. “Every year 2 million people die of dehydration. So it doesn’t matter if the glass is half full or half empty, there’s water in the cup. Drink it and stop complaining.” ~Rudy Francisco

True Stories – Rudy Francisco

What doesn’t kill you – Kelly Clarkson

Till next time ~Cowgirl Up and hang onto your spoons ~JPP

Spoonie Sunday – Aromatherapy massage (the final chapter)

Spoons

Well I guess we’ve all had about enough of aromatherapy and essential oils use but I just couldn’t go without mentioning this important aspect. I’m a big believer in massage. All massage, therapy massage, self massage, shiatsu massage, swedish massage … OK you get the idea. I’m a fan. Continue reading “Spoonie Sunday – Aromatherapy massage (the final chapter)”

One Liner Wednesday – Don’t poke the dragon

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Congratulations to Linda our one-liner Wednesday host on her nanowrimo progress. You go girl!

speak politely

There are times when a Spoonie’s day is measured by whether or not you have enough strength to take a shower. Today is such a day here at Chez Spoons, but like Linda “I’m gonna make it.” It snowed yesterday and a cyclone bomb is coming our way Friday so we went to town today while the sun was still out and the roads at least partly thawed for the remaining supplies needed for the week ahead. It was crazy, insane, waaay too peopley, and perhaps a little more than this Spoonie should have taken on. But ….

It’s a delicate balancing act between knowing when to tell your disease “you’re not the boss of me” and when to listen to it’s need to rest.

Today I will speak politely to the enraged dragon of my immune system. I will rest, and drink hot beverages, and be thankful for the peace of Thanksgiving eve.

Til next time ~Peace to you ~JPP

A Wolf Howls at No Moon – a MLMM Sunday Writing Prompt

MLMMSWP

Michael is the host this week of Sunday Writing Prompt over at Mindlovemiserysmenagerie.

The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” –Nelson Mandela

Compose a story in which you get yourself up off the ground or from some adversity and turn your situation into something positive.

Wow! THAT’s a prompt I gotta respond to. Now, I’m a Spoonie, I have four distinct separate chronic, incurable, life altering diseases. I fight for my life every day in ways you can’t imagine (well maybe you can) but that story doesn’t feel right for this. So … let’s go with this one.

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A Wolf Howls at No Moon

The fire burned bright and warm against the cool dampness of the pacific northwest night. No moon to detract from the stars, our remote wilderness campsite was naught but varying shades of darkness. Talk flowed freely among friends around the fire, the children were all nestled in their sleeping bags in a central tent surrounded by the smaller shelters of the adults. Military all, various firearms were disassembled, unloaded and locked up. Continue reading “A Wolf Howls at No Moon – a MLMM Sunday Writing Prompt”

All That Matters – Tuesday Writing Prompt

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courtesy of dotlizard on pixabay

For the Tuesday Writing Prompt Challenge at Godoggocafe

Today’s prompt: Write a piece of prose around the question: “I never mattered much to you, did I?”

All That Matters

Chinese dragons fill the air, flying high across the park. A child runs by laughing holding tight to the string of her kite. I laugh and tug at your arm to show you the joy in her smile. You hurry me along saying “it doesn’t matter.”

Tiny buds begin to form on the lilac bush growing tall and feral, the promise of Spring, of warmth and beauty. I call you to come and see, but you shrug and go back to your paper “it just doesn’t matter to me.”

All the beauty I tried to show you, all the love I tried to give you. Through a gossamer haze I see you now in your fine black suit, single red rose dropping into the grave. A tear slips down your weathered face. Why? I was never able to make you see, never able to love you quite the right way. Nothing ever mattered much to you. I never mattered much to you.  Did I?  I think it sad that we’ll never know, as I slip silently into the light.

word count 178

Til next time ~Peace ~JPP

My Wabi Sabi Heart – a cracked quadrille

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Whimsygizmo is hosting quadrille night at dVerse Poets Pub tonight and bids us take a crack at poeming.

My Wabi Sabi* Heart

my wabi sabi heart
is filled with cracks and holes
letting in the light
that colors up my soul
cerulean blues, volcanic reds
and yellows
kaleidoscope colors of my years
and I am grateful for every shade
bright white laughter
and glistening black tears

word count 44

*Wabi-Sabi is a Japanese word with many meanings relating to observance of the impermanence and imperfections of life. The definition I have always found most enjoyable came to me from a street vendor in Osaka, Japan “it is a way of living that focuses on the beauty within the imperfections of life and peaceful acceptance of the natural cycle of decay.”

Til next time ~Peace ~JPP