Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “key.” Use it any way you’d like. Have fun!
The Key to Her Success
The skinny little wretch sat there on the barstool, mocking me.
“Oh the key to my dieting success? I just forget to eat sometimes.” She said it calmly while scarfing down an order of wings with blue cheese and one of those silly froo-froo cocktails with enough sugar to put someone like me into a coma.
I may have rolled my eyes just a little while she polished off the double order of grease and goo. I mean honestly, forget to eat? Really? Lady you gotta be some kind of stupid to forget to eat.
Now I’m in my 60’s, and I’ve forgotten a LOT of things. I’ve forgotten the budget report the day I was supposed to present it to the board of directors. I’ve forgotten my keys, forgotten where I parked my car (once when I was at home). I’ve forgotten my parents anniversary, I’ve forgotten my own anniversary. I’ve forgotten my children’s names, I’ve forgotten my purse, my phone, my bra (yeah let’s not dwell on that one). I’ve forgotten to unplug the iron, I’ve forgotten how the heck to open that stupid child-proof zip lock bag and had to get my grandson to help me. But never, ever, not once, have I forgotten to EAT.
“You don’t look bad honey, you should just get so busy you forget all about eating for awhile.”
I smiled my best Monalisa smile, snatched the last wing off the plate, chugged the last of my light beer and belched. “Sorry girlfriend, just won’t work.”
For the second time in 12 years, I find myself NOT cooking dinner for 200+ people. No really, I made Thanksgiving dinner at an RV park we stayed at. Park bought the turkey, gravy, ham and potatoes. I shoveled stuff in and out of ovens, peeled, cooked and mashed 60 pounds of potatoes! Yeah, kind of glad that’s over with 😉 Last year we were in New Zealand where in February they celebrate Waitangi Day a national day of thanksgiving. Ahhhh the memories.
Frank Hubeny is hosting at dVerse Poets Pub and in critiques and craft asks us to practice the imitation of a favored style of poetry.
I have always loved the style of lyric poetry. Often transmuted with music into “songs” from “Ode to Billy Joe” to “Good Stuff” to “Honey” they are (imo) poetry, sonnets sometimes, that tell a story with a really catchy tune thrown in for good measure (pun intended). It’s a style of writing that I love to imitate. On a personal note, I’m in the middle of an autoimmune flare of epic proportions right now so I’m feeling the need for a little Spoonie humor (bear with me I have anesthesia brain).
Ode to Prednisone* (if you’re in a musical state of mind, sing to the tune of the theme from “Spiderman”)
Prednisone, oh Prednisone you gave me cataracts and several broken bones Once again I’m stuck with you ’cause the doctors don’t know what else to do so here I am back on the Prednisone
Prednisone, oh Prednisone I put drugs in my lungs but the wheeze ain’t gone I’ve got drops going in my eyes and fat cells multiplying on my thighs oh crap I’m back on the Prednisone
Prednisone, oh Prednisone the mood swings you cause are bad enough alone water on my ankles and my knees but for some reason I still can’t pee watch out, I’m back on the Predisone
watch out, I’m back on the Prednisoooooone
*Prednisone is an immunosuppressant medication in the drug class of corticosteroids commonly used to treat autoimmune disorders and many other diseases as well. The list of side effects is ominous and waaaay to long to list here so if your curious google it.
Til next time
~When the Devil whispers “you can’t withstand the storm”
the Spoonie Warrior screams back “F #$% OFF I’M ON PREDNISONE AND I’LL RIP YOUR FACE OFF!” 😉
I can’t think of Halloween without remembering my black cats. I’ve had several. Boo Boo was probably my favorite, so black she was almost red, slitted, creepy yellow eyes. The very thing cat phobias are made of but she was adorable and precious. Anyone who has ever had a cat partner will tell you, nobody owns a cat, especially a black cat.Continue reading “31 days of October Challenge – Black Cats”→